GirlsAffair: Overcome your Biggest Enemy...: Hello Everyone, Do you know what is the #1 enemy in your life? It's your FEAR... Fear has always been a big ...
Overcome your Biggest Enemy...
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What do you Believe?
Hi Dearie,
Back to self-belief…
Most people are filled with negativity that holds them from reaching
their full potential in life.
When was the last time you doubted yourself…?
That maybe you are not good enough to accomplish something…
Yes?
And how did it make you feel?
Lousy I bet…
It leads you to think you may fail and that leads to
fear too.
Fear then leads to anxiety.
And this anxiety and self-doubt combination starts to consume
your confidence and determination to do
anything.
Anxiety and Self-doubt is the perfect recipe for
under achievement.
I have my fair share of self-doubt in the past and it
doesn’t mean
that I don’t have it now.
I just don’t let it bother me...
One of the ways I motivate myself to accomplish my goals is I would tell
myself “If they can do it, so can I…”. We all have different abilities and
strength but it’s not these attributes that determines your success.
It’s your powerful Self-Belief!
Learn to affirm yourself that you can do what you want to do. If you want to get your goals accomplished, cast away your self-doubts. Without self-doubt, you will be able to take the first step.
No matter small it is…
To build on the second…
Then the third…
And don't forget to give yourself credit for those Small Wins (very important).
Before you know it, you are already half-way to your goal. And accomplishing
that goal is certainly within your reach!
So take the first step to build your self-belief today…
Best Wishes.
Clarity Over Life Issues
Dearie,
I trust that you've been well.
It's in my heart to help others move towards achieving their life's success and I find that nothing is more important than having clarity over issues we faced in life.
I would like to share with you a simple life lesson I've learnt over the past 30 years, that has helped me refocus my mind when I am faced with immense pressure.
I'm sure you'll agree with me that focus and clarity on the tasks at hand
is the most needful to power through your day. We are faced with many
challenges and distractions daily. Often, we get stuck and overwhelmed by
sudden unlucky events e.g. getting fired from your place of work or losing business deals.
Perhaps the following feelings may surface in quick
succession:
1. Regret
2. Anger
3. Panic
4. Depressed
When I am faced with the above, I will ask myself this key question.
Is this problem SOLVABLE or UNSOLVABLE?
There
could be two possible outcomes. It's either a NO or a YES.
If the answer is NO, then we would need to take certain responsibility for our
actions and face the repercussions.
However, if the answer is YES, the solution is simple.
Take active steps to resolve the issue!
This tool allows us to dispel away the
negative feelings listed above and focus on solving the problem.
(EXTRA!!) Do you know what the good news is?
All problems are SOLVABLE, 80% of the time! It means that almost ALL your problems can be solved!
How AWESOME is that?
Best Wishes.
Learn from the Past
Sometimes we can’t learn from the mistakes of others—we have to make the mistakes ourselves and figure out what works for us!
All of us are going through life trying to be the best version of ourselves, but if you’re carrying regrets from past decisions, you’ll be hindered in the decisions you’re making now.
Learn from your experiences, and learn to improve on what you’re doing as you move forward!
Best Wishes.
GirlsAffair: Life Lesson: You can Rise Above Your Circumstances...
GirlsAffair: Life Lesson: You can Rise Above Your Circumstances...: Good morning dearie, Have you ever felt that you're not good enough? Or maybe, you encountered a hopeless circumstance an...
Life Lesson: You can Rise Above Your Circumstances
Good morning dearie,
Have you ever felt that you're not good enough?
Or maybe, you encountered a hopeless circumstance and you felt that you'll never make it big in life.
Perhaps you're knee-deep in debt. Or you are that high performing employee who was retrenched without a cause and you couldn't understand it.
I know how all of the above feels. I have been
through all these personally too.
So, the key question is: Are We Losers?
Want to know an ABSOLUTELY LIFE-CHANGING fact?
Before you were born, you were part of two creatures. One is the big headed, small tailed, tadpole like creature called the sperm. The other is a monster spherical ball, called the egg.
The sperm had to fight stiff competition with 100 millions of other similar creatures when they raced at breakneck speed towards the final goal - the egg, in the mother's reproductive system.
Most of the time, only one egg, will emerge as the ULTIMATE CHAMPION. That one sperm was the ONLY QUALIFIED creature that is allowed by the egg to enter and be fertilized.
Guess what?
YOU'RE THAT CHAMPION!
This is a revelation and a life lesson that I learnt. I want you to know that no matter what happens in life, regardless the challenge, you're already a
WINNER!
You have run that race, finished strong and you survived!
Now you tell me... Are you a Winner or a Loser? =)
Go well towards your desired success!
Best Wishes.
GirlsAffair: "ARE YOU HAVING AN EMOTIONAL AFFAIR"?
GirlsAffair: "ARE YOU HAVING AN EMOTIONAL AFFAIR"?: I think this might be of help... "ARE YOU HAVING AN EMOTIONAL AFFAIR"? If anybody asks you this question, you may go ...
"ARE YOU HAVING AN EMOTIONAL AFFAIR"?
"ARE YOU HAVING AN EMOTIONAL AFFAIR"?
If anybody asks you this question, you may go angry or livid because it sounds so insulting. Why?
You are never the type of person that would have an affair outside your relationship/marriage. Well, that
is because you do not know what an emotional affair is.
Emotional affair does not involve sex. It happens to people who are in courtship or engaged or married but very fond of somebody else who is not their
spouse but if care is not taken and brake applied, it can lead to full blown sexual affair.
Emotional affair does not only happen to people in bad, unhappy marriages. It can happen to happy couples, morally sound people and deeply spiritual individuals who love God with all their hearts and hate sin. It can even happen to great men and women of God.
How then do they fall into emotional affair?
Emotional affair is not easy to detect at the beginning. It all starts as plain, platonic friendship with the opposite sex whom you exchange ideas with and find admirable -that's all. The friend can be a colleague at work, a fellow worker at church, a course mate, the secretary to the boss at the office or the next door neighbour. They are someone you find attractive and enjoy talking to. If you treat them like you treat any normal friends with no strings attached, there is no problem but if you are SECRETLY fond of them, there is a BIG problem.
Emotional affair starts rearing its ugly head if you are always eager to see them, anxious to hear from them and you feel sad if a day passes without getting in touch with them.
It escalates when you begin sharing deep personal issues, especially relational or marital problems and you find their words very soothing -it's like Valium, you can't sleep without it.
It progresses when there is subtle flirty compliments, sweet names calling and you never do anything to stop them. In fact, you love it and always look forward to hearing more from them.
You idolize them while comparing them with your spouse who always falls short. You see them as your comforter, healer and the only one who UNDERSTANDS you.
You begin to keep your conversations with them a secret from your spouse and deny every accusation of having any affair with them (since you are not having sex).
You have chemistry for them and always sexually charged when thinking about them or talking to them. Now, PULL A BRAKE!!!
You are threading on a very dangerous path while consoling yourself that you are not having sex. Most people, especially good people, do not plan cheating or adultery, it "just" happened when all red flags are ignored.
Face the fact that your relationship or marriage is sick that is why you are attracted to someone else and fix the problem. If you do not deal with your relationship or marital issues, you will keep pursuing them and end up sleeping with them and that is the beginning of the end of your relationship or marriage.
Pull back from that person and avoid discussing anything personal with them henceforth.
Come clean to your spouse and let them know you are getting attracted to someone else and you need their help. (You don't need to give them the full detail of your attraction).
Stop all chats, be very polite with their calls or ignore their calls altogether if you get tempted to go back.
Understand why you fell into emotional affair and take precautions lest you fall into another one.
Know that you are human and it is very possible to feel attracted towards the opposite sex, just don't pursue your object of attraction.
Set boundaries. Do not entertain ungodly relationships.
Have a full understanding of emotional affair and protect your heart from being tempted.
Remember, the Yoruba saying; "Ohun ti a ko bá niije, a kà fii run'mu". (Do not smell what you are not interested in eating).
Take charge of your life, do not leave your relationships to chance. Else, someone would equally loose your spouse to another person"
Twig Your Relationship
To daily transform all of your significant relationships for the better, you need to:
Listen– spend time trying to understand the perspective of others. Don’t rush to talk or solve problems; give them your full attention, your open mind, and your reservation of judgment.
Encourage– ask questions that draw out the opinions of others. What do they care about? What do they see? Why do they think or feel the way they do? Good questions help you uncover great insights.
Reason– carefully think through your response. You want to consider how the other person will react to your ideas. Don’t just rush to get an answer out; take time to reason through your ideas.
Respond– share your ideas with the other person, making sure to include your reasoning and how you took the other person’s ideas into account. Follow up with any action you propose.
It sounds so simple, doesn’t it? Just four little things. But if you’re honest with yourself, you’ll recognize the need to improve in at least one area. Taking time each day to be deliberate with others can be the key to changing a relationship for the better.
Best Wishes.
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