GirlsAffair: Women... Get to Understand your Cycle

GirlsAffair: Women... Get to Understand your Cycle: Most girls don't understand this because of much heavy grammar used to teach it, and we don't listen to our body too. I ...

Women... Get to Understand your Cycle

Most girls don't understand this because of much heavy grammar used to teach it, and we don't listen to our body too. I read, I started listening to my body for signs and I arrived at the simple analysis/steps........

MENSTRUAL PERIOD: The time blood flows out of your private area, when you use pad.

MENSTRUAL CYCLE: Days it takes to see another blood in the month. If you last saw your period in June 11th and it started again on July 10th 2019 , then you have 30days cycle (count from 11 June to 10 July).
NOTE: It is erroneous to believe it's 28days cycle, different women have different cycles ranging from 21-35 days.

OVULATION PERIOD: This is time to get pregnant without stress. This is 2 weeks after your period or 2 weeks before the next period.

Here's a simple way to calculate your ovulation (unsafe) period.
1. From the first day you see the blood of your period.
2. Pick up a calendar and count 15 days including the first day of the blood stain.
3. Mark the 15th day with a pen.
4. Mark 3 days before the 15th day, and mark 3 days after the 15th day.
6. You will notice you have 7 days marked.
These 7 days are your ovulation/fertile days also known as unsafe period.
That is if you have sex on any of these days, then you have 98% chances of being pregnant.
7. Do this every month diligently

For example:
1. If your period is 11th July, 2019 ,
2. 15 days after the first day of the blood stain will be on 25th of this July too (2weeks after) counting from 11th.
3. 15th day is on the 25th July 2019 .
4. 3days before the 15th day is 22, 23, 24.
5. 3days after 25th July 2019 is 26, 27, 28.
6. 22-28th July (7days) is when you are ovulating. It is your fertile period.

**Don't forget that the 7 days is a reminder that sperm stays in the female body for about 7 days. Any sexual contact in between ovulation period will form something that has ears, eyes, etc.

If you want a baby girl, have sex between 3 days before ovulation (22- 24th) 2019 .
For a baby boy on the main ovulation day and 3 days after 25th.

You don't need a doctor, just relax. After 2 weeks you may feel the following:
1. Headache.
2. High body temperature.
3. Dizziness (feeling of tiredness and sleepiness).
4. Breast tenderness/ size increases just like when you are menstruating.
5. Increased sex drive.
6. Light cramps or pain on one side of the pelvis.
7. Abdominal bloating.
8. Heightened sense of smell, taste or vision (you eat more).
9. Vagina mucus becomes slippery (if you notice, put it in between stretches like thick catarrh or snail mucus...colorless like egg white.

N/B: The instance here is for ladies with 30 days cycle. And someone who saw her period in July 2019 . If yours is 28, then it's 14 days and not 15 days.

If you have headache without a cause, check back to when your period started. You can drink both malt and peak milk....don't run to the pharmacist always on issues that can be naturally handled, because drugs are not always good on girls. Or you can take only paracetamol.

MEN, read and educate your wives and sisters, most don't know this.

Please Yourself First

Become my own best friend. 

For my happiness, I’m in charge. I stopped expecting others to make me happy and to fulfill my needs and desires.
I’ve made myself a priority in my own life. I engage in activities that bring me joy. I do more things for my heart and soul. This way, I create happiness from the inside out instead of chasing it through other people.
It is not my husband’s responsibility to make me feel valued, cherished, loved, whole, and complete; it’s mine.
Loving ourselves as a whole—mind, body, and soul—is not selfish; it is necessary. Being loved is a human need. However, being needy is something different. I came to understand that people who are taking good care of themselves are less dependent on the approval of others.
I pay attention to my self-talk. I eliminated disempowering words or thoughts from my repertoire: “I am stupid,” “I am too fat,” “I’m a failure,” “I’m not good enough.”
I treat myself with dignity and respect. I talk to myself kindly. I don’t call myself names and I acknowledge myself for my achievements, for my willingness to learn and grow. This way, my cup of self-love is always full, and external praise comes as a bonus.
I practice the art of embracing praise. I take compliments gracefully instead of putting myself down, as if I’m unworthy of such a celebration. I enjoy when people compliment me but I am not dependent on them to feel good about myself.
“It’s not your job to like me; it’s mine.” ~ Byron Katie
Once I decided to embrace myself with love and compassion, being alone didn’t feel scary or hard, and I started to enjoy my own company.
Just think from this perspective: Out of everyone you know in the world, the only person that is always present in your life, non-negotiable, day and night, is you. So if you don’t like being all by yourself, at least from time to time, you might need to work on the most important relationship you’ll ever get in life: the one with yourself.
To some people, the need to be alone could also be a personality issue, as introverted persons want to charge their batteries from the inside out and don’t always need to be surrounded by people. Meanwhile, I have met very extroverted people who suddenly didn’t need to spend so much of their time with others and started focusing more on themselves.
Being liked and included and feeling a sense of belonging to a community are basic human needs. As defined by Descartes, humans are “social animals.” However, many people use others as a diverting tool that helps them run from themselves.
I’ve been there as well in the past—spending time with others to feel seen or included, or keeping the TV switched on all day long in my home, even if I wasn’t watching. In reality, I was using that noise to run from my own thoughts and emotions.
When we have a harmonic relationship with ourselves, we no longer look to other people to fill holes in our self-esteem. We need people but we aren’t emotionally needy. There’s a big difference between the two.
“You can never feel lonely when you like the person you’re alone with.“ ~Wayne Dyer

(c) 2018 by Olayemi 


Rule 1.Choose your friends wisely. People can often surprise you.

Rule 2. Guard your personal information. You should only tell people what they need to know.

Rule 3. Trust people slowly. Always be the first one to welcome and befriend someone, but be the one of the last to truly trust them. 

Self Esteem

Never let anyone talk you down NEVER! Never let anyone make you feel any lesser than you are, because you are you. 
Be yourself, Be conscious of yourself, don't loose your self esteem all in the name of keeping friends, or in the name of marriage.

When you look around you will find out some person's has lost their self esteem, self worth all in the name of pleasing someone who they feel they owe so much to. 

Some lost theirs while growing up, while some lost theirs in the kinda relationship /Marriage they found themselves.

Self esteem is called SELF and esteem for a reason because it is YOU 👉you and you ALONE! It's your identity DO NOT LOOSE IT FOR ANYTHING.

I keep saying it everyone are unique in their own different ways so do not try to be somebody else rather be the better Version of yourself. You are Beautiful, unique, smart, Strong Don't let anyone take that away from you.

Keep wearing your armour of self esteem!

Take charge.



MARRIAGE is like a shoe. When you wear oversize be ready to drag it along through out life, and when you wear under-size be ready to feel the pains through out life." One thing about marriage is that you don't drop your shoe or remove it at any point, no matter how painful or how stressful it is.

That is why I thought it necessary to write you this letter.

Dear Singles,

When you are ready to buy your own shoe please take note of these three things:

Do not look for the beautiful ones, the nice ones or the cheap ones. Look for the one that is your size. Not every handsome, wealthy or intelligent guy is for you, not every beautiful woman is for you. Look for the one that is meant for you, the one that aligns with your values and beliefs, the one who you meet at your life's journey. 

It is important to know where you're going in life before you think of getting a wife or a husband.

All sizes of shoes are not placed in the same place.
There is a place for court shoes, laced up shoes, sport footwear, snickers etc. We have Children sizes, young people's sizes and the adult sizes. Know where to get your own shoe. Your size cannot be everywhere my brother, your type cannot be everywhere my sister. You cannot be a Christian, and be looking for a wife material at a club. Your wife or husband can't just be everywhere.

Stick to your values and therein you shall find someone like you, but when your values are not defined anyone can just match you. Discover yourself and define your values

In this kind of shoe purchasing enterprise, you are not permitted to try the shoe before you buy. This is why it is important to seek guidance and counseling, from people who have bought shoes before or are into the business of directing people to the right shoes (pastors, marriage counsellors and Relationship coaches).

And most importantly to avoid much time wasting , simply consult the shoe manufacturer to tell you your size (Almighty God).
NOTE :"You do not prepare for wedding, you prepare for marriage."

Ladies of today get so motivated when they attend weddings and they will quickly want to say yes to that guy. Wait!!! It is not just the wedding ooooh.

The wedding is just one day. After the wedding. WHAT NEXT?

Finally, it is not something you rush to the market and just pick a shoe because you like or can purchase it.

Ask questions

*Where is this shoe made from? (Background)
*What's the size (Values)
*How mucgh (His/Her interest)
*How long will it last (His/Her Character)
*Who made it? (Is she/He of the same faith This is compatibility)
*Will it match me? (This is whether he/she loves you and will accept you the way you are).

Dear one, remember many are dragging their foot and they would hardly reach their destinations, many are feeling endless pains and wish they could pull off the shoes but no way!!! I have seen people with beautiful shoes and when they show you their foot, you will see scars.

Beloved, it is not about the physical, it is the size, you can't know the size from afar so come close, build a relationship first but remember 'you are not permitted to try it before you buy it'.

And for those who have purchased the wrong shoes, you can still make it your size again if you'd consult the manufacturer and let Him have His way in your marriage.

May God bless us all. Feel free to share to all singles, you might be touching someone's life.

 Have a great day.

Your Perspective

Pause and Pounder...

People around Orita UI - Agbowo environ called him mad man but I was surprised when he moved close to me, and said, “can I ask you a very important question?” I nodded, in acceptance, and then he asked, “am I a mad man?”

The obvious answer, from a sane person, will be, "no", and that was what I said. “Thank you!”, he replied; then he said, “just because I don’t see things the way other people do, does that make me a mad man?” "No", I answered again.

He bent down, wrote “W”, and asked me what he wrote. At this point, I was already feeling ashamed, getting involved in a lengthy conversation with him. In a hurry to leave, I said “w”, but I was amazed when he replied to my answer, “You only see 'W', because of the angle at which you are looking at it. If you turn upside down, you'll see “M”; from the right side, it is “3”, and from the left side, it is “E”.

The fact that I don’t see things at the perspective that everyone is seeing it doesn’t make me a mad man, he said. Then he left.

I pondered for so long about this though; and more, its application to life.

We act, and relate to people, based on the perspective at which we are looking at their situation. Have you taken your time to look at other possible perspectives, views and angles, maybe, a little from their own view before we judge them?

I then decided that, before I get angry with, or act against, or judge, anyone that has done something unfavourable to me, I will view it in at least three possible perspectives, mine, theirs and others'.

So, before you judge people, before you rage your anger on them, take a little time to view their angle or perspective, and, if you still cannot see a reasonable reason, then you may act REASONABLY.

Have a great day dearie.

(c) Olayemi 2018.

Time Stops! A Story On Life Prolongation



Time stops .
Ever gone through a happy moment when time stops and seize to run its course? Walking hand in hand with your life partner into the sunset.
Cuddling with each other on a grass field while watching your children chasing each other around.

Time stops.
When your heart is broken. When you are still shell-shocked by the effect of her walking out through the door. It was your mistake, even though you had never intended to be harmful.
The usual routine of enjoying each other just side by side is replaced with emptiness. And hurt. Before you know it, dawn breaks. Where did those time go?

Time stops.
When you choose to take control of your life. Eat healthy, exercise, invest in skin care and supplements.
You can’t prevent the cruel onslaught of aging. You can’t evade the day you are to stand and be accountable to God.

But you can buy time. You can desire to look and feel young again. The wisest choice you’ve ever made with your hard-earned living, is to Buy more life itself --- time.

Here’s how. Invest in your body. Because when your body is able, your spirit can be willing all the time.
Because my body is able. I can stay up late to pray. I can pursue him by doing all the background work he didn’t see. I can correct the wrong that I’ve made and continue living without regret and depression.

All because I bought time. Because its worth it.
Just so you know. All these things. Not for yourself. But for the ones you love.


Time stops.

Yours truly,
Olayemi Agboola.

Motivational Story... A Stormy Night.

One stormy night an elderly man and his wife entered the lobby of a small hotel in Philadelphia, USA trying to get out of the rain . They approached the front desk in order to get some shelter for the night.
“Could you possibly give us a room here?” – the husband asked. The clerk gave a broad smile , looked at the couple and explained that it was unfortunate that there were three simultaneous conventions in town. “All of our rooms are taken,” the clerk said. “ But I can’t send a nice couple like you out into the rain at one o’clock in the morning. Would you perhaps be willing to sleep in my room? It’s not exactly a suite, but it will be good enough to make you folks comfortable for the night.” When the couple declined, the young man insisted . “Don’t worry about me, I shall be fine.” the clerk told them. So the couple agreed.
As he paid his bill the next morning, the elderly man appreciated the kindness of the clerk and said to the clerk, “You deserve to be the kind of manager who should be the boss of the best hotel in town. Maybe someday I’ll build one for you.” The clerk looked at them and smiled. The three of them had a good laugh. As they drove away, the elderly couple agreed that the helpful clerk was indeed an exceptional manager.
Two years passed. The clerk had almost forgotten the incident when he received a letter from the old man. It recalled that stormy night and enclosed a round-trip ticket to New York, asking the young man to pay them a visit. The old man met him in New York, and led him to the corner of Fifth Avenue and 34th Street. He then pointed to a great new building there, a pale reddish stone, with imposing elevation and watchtowers thrusting up to the sky.
“That,” said the older man, “is the hotel I have just built for you to manage.” “You must be joking.” – the young man said. “I can assure you I am not.” – said the older man, a sly smile playing around his mouth. The older man’s name was William Waldorf-Aster, and that magnificent structure was the original Waldorf-Astoria Hotel. The young clerk who became its first manager was George C. Boldt. This young clerk never foresaw that a single act of kindness would catapult him to become manager of one of the world’s most glamorous hotels.
Be kind to everybody. It will enrich you multi fold in the long run.

For You to...


I don't know who this is meant for, I felt very strong to share the experience,
"I walked into a hotel and after going through the menu, I ordered some food. After about 20 minutes a group of guys and ladies walked in and ordered for theirs. To my dismay, these folks got served first. I watched as they began to eat and laugh heartily. I even overheard one of them bragging about how connected he is to everyone in the hotel and I felt mocked. I decided to leave. Unable to take it anymore, I called the waiter. He calmly told me: *"yours is a special order, being prepared by the chief chef himself. Their orders were prepared hurriedly by students on attachment because the top chefs are busy with yours sir. That's why they were served first. Please have some juice as you wait".* I calmed down and waited patiently.

Shortly after, my meal was served by 6 waiters. Unknown to me, the owner of the hotel (who happened to be an old long lost friend of mine) saw me when I entered and decided to surprise me. She changed my simple meal to a five-star meal. The party at the other table were shocked. They couldn't stop staring. Suddenly they were the ones murmuring, asking why they didn't get that kind of service and meal.

Such is life! Some people are ahead of you and are eating now, laughing at you and talking about how they are smarter, wiser and better than you, how they are well connected, blessed, have money and are enjoying life. You are waiting tirelessly wondering why it's taking so long to breakthrough, You endure mockery and humiliation. Maybe you have contemplated suicide, gone through depression or suffered severe mental anxiety. Do not worry! The owner of the world has seen you and doesn't want you to be served a simple meal like those making mockery. You're waiting long because yours is a special meal. It takes time to prepare. And only chief chefs prepare them.

Wait for your meal and relax. When it comes that laughing party will be silenced for good.

Stay Blessed and enjoy your day.

This is my word of encouragement to YOU today.

Olayemi (c)2018