I want to share with you this story I reflected on recently. Am sure you are familiar with the story or heard about it in form of song from the renowned musician Ebenezer Obey:
An old couple had a donkey. It was their only means of transport to and fro.
One day they were riding together on the donkey, some villagers saw them and commented:
"Two people on a donkey's back? Poor animal!"
The couple were affected. On their next outdoors trip, the old man sat on the donkey while his spouse walked.
The villagers saw this and said: "He's letting his wife walk? How cruel!"
The old man was shocked. On their way back home, he asked his spouse to sit on the donkey while he walked. The villagers saw it and said: "Letting the wife ride the donkey? How stupid!"
The old man was at his wits' end. At the next outing, both him and his spouse walked while taking the donkey along. This time, the villagers exclaimed: "What idiots! They don't even know how to utilise the donkey!"
Have you ever had similar experiences as the old couple?
The feeling like nothing that you've done is right.
Well, I want to let you know that people will always have something to say about what they see.
Everyone has their own perspective on what to do, when to do, how to do things. But they are not YOU.
They may not know you well, they may not know your intents, neither will they really care.
What is most important is you stay true to yourself.
Do what you have to do and don't feel guilty or sad because of what others say about you and of you.
You are not your past, neither will your present define your future.
Everything great in your future comes from a little shift in your perspective.
Love and forgive yourself and stay true. Fight on!
I wanted to share with you this story I came across today.
It set me thinking about what we are truly running after in our lives.
Hope you get some great revelations out of it like I did.
I was jogging this morning and I noticed a person about 1/2 a kilometre ahead. I could tell he was running a little slower than me and I thought, good, I shall try to catch him. I had about a kilometre before I needed to turn off. So I started running faster and faster.
Every block, I was gaining on him just a little bit. After just a few minutes I was only about 100 metres behind him, so I really picked up the pace and pushed myself. You would have thought I was
running in the last leg of an Olympic competition. I was determined to catch him.
Finally, I did it! I caught and passed him. On the inside, I felt so good. "I beat him" Of course, he didn't even know we were racing. After I passed him, I realized I had been so focused on competing
against him that I had missed my turn. I had gone nearly six blocks past my turn and I had to turn and go back.
Isn't that what happens in life when we focus on competing with co-workers, neighbours, friends, family, trying to outdo them or trying to prove that we are more successful or more important?
We spend our time and energy running after them and we miss out on our own paths to our given destinies. The problem with unhealthy competition is that it's a never ending cycle.
There will always be somebody ahead of you, someone with a better job, nicer car, more money in the bank, more education, a prettier wife, a more handsome husband, better behaved children, etc. But realize that "You can be the best that you can be, when you are not competing with anyone."
Some people are insecure because they pay too much attention to what others are, where others are going, wearing and driving. Take whatever you have, the height, weight and personality. Dress well and wear it proudly, you'll be blessed by it.
Stay focused and live a healthy life. There is no competition in Destiny.
Run your own race and wish others well.
Sometimes it’s easy to get stuck in a routine that actually makes us miserable. We get up every morning and rush to a job that’s not quite fulfilling, put up with relationships that are emotionally draining, and regularly set aside hobbies and activities that would make us infinitely happier (if only we made time for them).
What if we take steps toward what we think will make us happier but still end up disappointed?
Although we spend more time than we’d like to admit day dreaming about how much happier we could be, we rarely make the changes that will get us there because of one looming fear: what if we take steps toward what we think will make us happier but still end up disappointed?
If you’re tired of complaining about how miserable you are but scared of making changes, read on for five ways to get happier and overcome the fear that’s holding you back:
1. Define what happiness means for YOU.
We get mixed messages from our family members, friends, and society at large about what happiness is and how to achieve it. For decades, the so-called American Dream was depicted as a well-paying job, a white picket fence, 2.5 kids, and a dog in the yard. But the tide is turning, and different images of happiness are breaking that mold.
In order to be truly happy, we need to know what happiness means for us. If you’re feeling stuck, consider whether the happiness you’re seeking is actually what you want or if it’s merely what you think you should want. Clarifying your happiness goals will make it easier to identify the steps you need to achieve them.
2. Know that you deserve happiness.
You deserve to be happy. Yes, you! To say that we deserve happiness is one thing, but to actually believe those words wholeheartedly is quite another. Maybe childhood experiences or past relationships have made it difficult for you to acknowledge that you deserve happiness every bit as much as anyone else.
Poor self-esteem can hinder us from pursuing our dreams because we ultimately don’t believe that we’re worth the effort or deserve the positive outcome. Remind yourself every day that you’re worthy of the happiness you seek, and keep saying it to yourself until you actually believe it.
3. Make your happiness a priority.
Oftentimes, we’re willing to put everyone else’s needs ahead of our own and place our own happiness on hold. But in order to have the energy to take care of others, whether it’s family, a demanding boss, or a friend in need, we must make our own happiness a priority.
Find ways to create more balance in your life so that you can focus on your own goals in addition to being the rockstar parent, employee, and friend that you already are. In doing so, you’ll be setting healthy boundaries and setting a great example for those around you.
4. Prepare for change.
As creatures of habit, any routine can become a bit too comfortable, even when it consists of constant rants to friends and family about how miserable we are. Although we may spend a huge chunk of the day fantasizing about how much happier we would be if we could only find a more meaningful job, ditch a dysfunctional relationship, or finally take that dream vacation, we tend to stay stagnant because we’re afraid of the uncertainty involved in making a change.
To avoid getting stuck, take time to think about how you would deal with any challenges you might encounter along the way. By doing so, you’ll feel more prepared and capable of handling the uncertainty that comes along with change.
5. Believe in yourself.
How many times have you contemplated change and caught yourself thinking “I can’t do this” or “I’ll never succeed”? Stop listening to that inner critic. When it comes to making important life decisions, we all experience fear and self-doubt.
The only difference between those who stay stuck and those who take action is the ability to notice those thoughts when they do occur, set them aside, and move forward despite them. Remind yourself what your happiness goals are, and believe in your ability to achieve them.